ELEHIYANG NABUKING BINIGKAS NG BATANG
TUBONG BLUMENTRITT
Ni E. San Juan, Jr.
Oo, tapos na, di na tayo pupunta sa Tondo ng ating kamusmosan—
Kung saan sabi mo mahal mo ako, di malilimutan—Tapos na iyon!
Di na tayo babalik doon-- Oo, sa Bangkusay o Plaza Moriones—
Hindi ko na matandaan kung sa Tayuman o Bambang tayo unang nagkita
O baka sa tren sa Tutuban o sa loobang sanglaan sa Divisoria….
Oo, di na tayo babalik sa Tondo, doon sa lumundong dulo ng buhay—
…..Hindi ko na nga maalala kung saang liko sa Juan Luna ang daan….
Oo, tapos na, ngayong gabi nagpasiya kang tapos na ang pagsuyo—
Gabing kay lungkot, umaapaw hanggang sa estero ng Binondo
Hindi na tayo babalik doon tulad nang nakalipas— Ay, hindi na!
Hindi ko na magunita kung saang sulok sa Tondo tayo nagtapo
Tapos na, hindi na tayo babalik sa Gagalangin—mundong kaylupit!
Kung saan ang sumpang binitiwan ay naligaw sa tulay ng Dimasalang
…..Hindi ko na nga matandaan kung saang liko sa Dapitan lumisan….
Oo, di na tayo babalik sa pook ng lambingang ngayo’y Smokey Mountain….
Di ko na nga maalala kung saan kita naiwan, saang lugar babalikan—
Kapus-palad na pag-ibig, ay, nasawi sa mundong nagsalabit sa pangako—
Ay tapos na, di ko na nga matandaan ang daang papunta sa Tondo—
Di ko na magunita ang tipanan sa Quiapo? Sa Mendiola ba o sa Luneta?
Oo, tapos na, di na tayo babalik sa tinding niyapos, ay, kumilig sa pag-sinta—
…Dito na lang kayo muna sa Blumentritt pagkagaling sa Culi-Culi,
Nakalimutan ko na ang ruta papunta sa sementeryong La Loma—
Oo, hindi na tayo babalik, hindi na, tapos na, magpakailanman—
Pagkasiyahin ang pira-pirasong pulutang napanis sa gabi ng sumpaan….
______________________________________________________________
BETRAYED ELEGY RECITED BY A BLUMENTRITT NATIVE
Yes, it’s over, we’ll not go to the Tondo of our childhood
Where you said you loved me, never to be forgotten—That’s finished!
We’ll never return to that spot—Yes, Bangkusay or Plaza Moriones—
I can’t recall whether it’s Tayuman or Bambang where we first met,
Perhaps in a Tutuban train or an indoor pawnshop in Divisoria…
Yes, we will not go back to Tondo, there where life’s horizon-line sagged—
…I can’t remember now which street-turn in Juan Luna marked our path….
Yes, all over, tonight you decided that our dalliance is ended—
A night so wretched, overflowing up to the stinking canal of Binondo…
We will not go back there as we did before—Aie, no more!
I cannot remember at which corner in Tondo we first met,
It’s finished, we’ll not retreat to Gagalangin—a world utterly ruthless!
Where our promises, disavowed, got lost in the bridge in Dimasalang…
Indeed, I cannot remember which street-corner in Dapitan I fled from….
Yes, we will not withdraw to the place of caressing, now Smokey Mountain….
I can’t recall now where exactly I left you, where I should retrieve you—
Curse-stricken love, Aie, victimized in a world bewildered by promises—
Aie, it’s done, I can’t remember the streets leading to Tondo—
I can’t find in memory our trysting spot in Quiapo? Or Mendiola or Luneta?
Yes, it’s finished, we’ll not go back to the pain we embraced, amorous shudder—
Let’s stay here, linger in Blumentritt after visiting Cull-Culi,
Anyway I have forgotten the route debouching to the La Loma cemetery—
Yes, we will not go back, no more, it’s over, forever and ever—
Let the fragments of this appetizer suffice, spoiled in the night of avowals
and disavowals….
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LAKBAY NG BAGUNTAONG NAGLAGALAG
Pumalaot na, walang tiyak na daungan o dalampasigan—
Kung saan ko naisip makarating, wala ako roon, humantong man….
Sandaling sumungaw sa butas ng aking himlayan, bulalakaw!
Nakabalik ka rin mula sa Taormina, sintang balikbayan,
Tumupad sa pangakong magbabalik kung kinakailangan
“Kusang binangga kami ng Intsik, di kami tinulungan—
Umikot muna upan tiyaking lumubog na, tapos tumakbo!”
Batid mong ngayon ay inaanod, napapadpad sa kinabukasan
Kaya hindi ka na tumigil sa Thessaloniki, naibsan ang pighati—
Sabi ng pilosopo, ang gumugulong ay di hihinto hanggang di pinipigil….
Umiiwas ka sa unos o sigwa, di mo akalaing babanggain ka….
“Oo, umikot sila, nilente kami, nang matantong lubog na,
Dagling sumibat, tumakbong palayo! Walang awang mga hayup!”
[Testimonyo ng kapitan ng GEM VIRI, 6/14/2019]
Nakabalik na mula sa Colombo, Sri Lanka, taglay sa pusong nawindang
Ang memorabilya ng Tigreng Tamil, mandirigmang nakaligtas….
Kung hindi ikaw, sino ang sasagip sa nasawing manlalayag?
Umiwas ka sa lagim ng sakuna, sa tukso ng Mutya ng Bali,
Kundi ngayon, kailan pa? Saan isusugod ang katawang naipit?
Binangga kaming pumalaot, lumayag, tinawid ang panahong masungit….
Binangga nga—Gulat, nasindak, daigdig mo’y abot lamang sa hiyaw
Ng saklolo sa dalampasigan ng Davao, Jolo, o Zamboanga—
Buti’t di ka napikot ng aswang sa Siquijor o tokhang sa Mindoro—
Binangga ka ng maamo’t mailap na buwitre ng imperyong sumasakop—
Di na kailangang humibik, ngitngit ng himagsik sa kapalarang nasapit—
Bakit nga ba tumawid ang hayop sa kabilang ibayo?
Tanaw mo na sa pinto ng San Agustin ang kumakaway na bisig—
Sa Balwarte ng San Diego naglalamay armadong kaluluwang lagalag….
JOURNEY OF THE YONG MAN WHO WANDERED
[From the Philippine Customs Declaration Form No.117, Item #7: “Materials advocating or inciting treason, rebellion, insurrection, sedition against the government of the Philippines”]
Shipped out, no definite pier to reach or shoreline—
Where I thought of arriving, I am not there, even if the drift compels the traveler….
For an instant, through a hole in my sleeping quarter, flashed a shooting star!
So you’ve returned from Taormina, beloved expatriate,
Fulfilling the promise that you’ll come back if needed—
“We were rammed by the Chinese, they didn’t help us—
They circled first to make sure we’ve sunk, then scrammed!”
You know now you’re being carried away, floating toward tomorrow
So, therefore, you did not tarry at Thessaloniki, with grief subsiding—
The philosopher taught: what is rolling will not stop until it is impeded…
You were trying to elude squalls or storms, you didn’t suspect they will strike….
“Yes, they turned around, spotlighted us, when sure we were sunk,
Swiftly they fled, sped away! Beasts devoid of pity or mercy!”
[Testimony of the captain of the fishing boat GEM VIRI, 4/14/2019]
You’ve returned from Colombo, Sri Lanka, bearing in your bruised heart
Memorabilia from the Tamil Tigers, guerilla warriors who survived….
If not you, who else will save the disaster-stricken voyagers?
You evaded the misery of accident, seduced by the Muse of Bali,
If not now, when? What will the wrecked body assault?
We were rammed, far out in the ocean, defying the miserable weather….
They hit us—Shocked, panicked, your world touched only by the shout
Of succor at the shores of Davao, Jolo, or Zamboanga—
Lucky you were not tempted by the Siquijor witch or police-killers in Mindoro—
You were rammed by gentle but sneaking vultures of the colonizing empire—
No need to cry out for help, rebellious anger at the fortune encountered—
Why indeed did the animal cross the road to the other side?
You can glimpse from the door of St Agustin’s church those arms waving—
At the San Diego rampart, in nightlong vigil, armed souls wandering….###
__________________________________________________________
“MAGKASIPING BUONG GABI”
[Hiwa mula sa awit ni Rico Puno]
Magkatabi lang—di magkayakap— silang nasawi sa engkuwentro
sa Nagsugbu, Batangas,
nireport sa TV, radyo, 28 Nobyembre 2017…
Magkatabi sina Josephine Anne Lapira at Glen Aytona, nakahandusay….
Ewan kung magkasuyo magdamag….
Pahayag ni Kumander Patnubay de Guia: “Oo, amin sila….”
Inangkin ng ina ang walang kislap na mata ni Glen Aytona,
Umahon ang mga bodhisattva mula sa liblib na purok ng Samsara—
Sa paglipat nawindang ang duguang blusa ni Kamila Mangan—
Magkatabi ang mga bangkay, daing natin, patungong Nirvana
mula sa masukal na sitio ng Batulan at Pinamintasan….
Magkayap na kaya sila sa buong magdamag ng paglalamay?
Sambitin mo, Kumander, kung hindi nawaldas ang alay nila….
Naumid ang dila, nabingi, sumikip ang agwat
ng Samsara at Nirvana, ng sandaling ito at magdamag….
Di lang isa ang kandila, batid natin ang mga pangalan:
Josephine, Kamila, Glen—
“Magkasuyo buong gabi” ang mga magulang, asawa, katipan….
Ito ba ang ating daigdig? Patuloy ba tayong maglalambingan
sa awit ng mga sirena sa TV, radyo, midya?
Wala nang tinig kundi sikdo’t kabog ng dibdib,
umaangil, sumasabog sa daigdig na gumuho’t nawarak.
__________________________________________________________________
ENTWINED TOGETHER THROUGHOUT THE NIGHT
Beside each other—not embracing—witness now the slain bodies
from the encounter at Nasugbu, Batangas,
reported by TV, radio, almost three years ago…
Lying together are Josephine Anne Lapira and Glen Aytona, flung there….
Don’t know if they will fondle each other all night….
Declared Kumander Patnubay de Guia: “Yes, they’re ours….”
Glen’s sparkless eyes were claimed by his mother, the others….
Bodhisattvas surged forth from Samsara”s clandestine groves—
Transported, the bloody blouse of Kamila Mangan was ripped apart—
Corpses close to each other, we cried, edging toward Nirvana
from the wild ravines of Batulan and Pinamintasan….
Are they now caressing each other throughout the mourning vigil?
Confess it, Kumander, if their offerings were futile, wasted….
Tongue frozen, deafened, the chasm between Samsara and Nirvana,
between this moment and the abundant night, overflowed….
Not just one candle, we knew their names: Josephine, Kamila….
“Clasping each other nightlong,” their parents, spouses, inamoratas….
“Is this our world?” Do we plod on with amorous rituals
spewed out in the songs of sirens in TV, radio, media?
Voices exhausted, only the throb and pounding of the breast
seething in fury, exploding in this world blown apart, smithereens—
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